Subscribe to our stuff

TA-01 — Hi Beautiful.
TA-133 — Picture of heart
TA-134 — Picture of Peace Sign
TA-150 — Bless your heart.
TA-171 — I believe in love at first sight.
TA-177 — I'm so excited to go to sleep at night so I can dream about you!!!
TA-25 — I think you're cute.
TA-28 — Love you. Miss you. Need you. (LYMYNY).
TA-35 — I love you.
TA-38 — Will you marry me when you grow up?
TA-54 — If we have to go bankrupt you're the only one I would want to go bankrupt with.
TA-60 — I love you even though you aggravate the hell out of me.
TA-65 — Please let me into your life.
TA-98 — I'm really going to miss you when you're gone. Will you bring me back a surprise?

TA-06 — Asshole.
TA-22 — I do not like you anymore.
TA-26 — You are selfish.
TA-50 — Thank you for ruining my life.
TA-76 — Every time I think of you I hate you even more.
TA-124 — You are the meanest person ever.
TA-156 — Now I remember why I hate you.
TA-157 — Even in my dreams I ignore you.
TA-200 — You're a grouch.
TA-203 — Schmuck.
TA-206 — Nothing pleases me more than seeing you miserable.
TA-220 — You are a bossy control freak.
TA-223 — You make it so easy to hate you.

TA-02 — I want to hold the clicker.
TA-12 — Even I couldn't live with me.
TA-23 — I know you have your period and you are very angry. I'll just slip this under your door quietly and tip toe away.
TA-24 — Do you like me?
TA-52 — Please come back my heart hurts.
TA-63 — You left me and never said goodbye.
TA-64 — When did you stop noticing me?
TA-66 — Is it because you think I'm fat?
TA-68 — Remember when you used to hold me all night?
TA-69 — If money will make you happy what if we never have any money?
TA-73 — I miss you.
TA-74 — Sometimes I still look at the phone and wonder if you'll call.
TA-75 — Wow. You really broke my heart.
TA-77 — I'm not over you.
TA-79 — You are the luckiest guy in the world. I would love to be married to me.
TA-96 — I made the biggest mistake of my life when I let you go.

TA-05 — If I was a Mormon Fundamentalist I would want you as my sister wife.
TA-10 — I am a convicted felon.
TA-13 — Do you often get the feeling that people want to kick your ass?
TA-17 — You are weird.
TA-21 — Nobody cares about the little one.
TA-34 — I want to work for you.
TA-36 — You are psycho.
TA-37 — I'm pregnant.
TA-39 — You're my best friend.
TA-44 — You are a bad person.
TA-45 — You are a good therapist.
TA-46 — Vagina.There I said it.
TA-47 — I have my period.
TA-53 — I'm sorry I haven't kept in touch but I'm having a nervous breakdown. I thought you should know.
TA-56 — "If-the-gif, you-the-gou, can-the-gan, read-the-gead, this-the-giss, then-the-gen, we-the-gee, are-the-gar, life-the-gife, time-the-gime, friends the giends.
TA-57 — You have to stop acting like that or I will have to start talking about you to other people.
TA-58 — You scare me.
TA-59 — Hi. Just thought I'd say Hi.
TA-62 — You are an obnoxious teenager.
TA-80 — I hate this job. You're a bunch of losers! Just kidding.
TA-82 — A best friend should not like someone who is mean to the other best friend.
TA-89 — Your husband is cheating on you.
TA-90 — Your wife is cheating on you.
TA-91 — Your child does drugs.
TA-92 — Please wear deodorant.
TA-97 — I forgot.
TA-111 — And... the award goes to you for being the biggest bitch.
TA-112 — You remind me of the time I went crazy.
TA-114 — Stop Texting.
TA-115 — When you know what's a really good wine you can come over.
TA-125 — Everybody's so uptight.
TA-141 — Picture of repeat with line going through it.
TA-143 — I didn't intentionally screw you up psychologically.
TA-147 — I ran away. I'm fine. I'll be back by Sunday.
TA-149 — It was so much easier when we had a still in the backwoods.
TA-152 — Guess what? I got knocked up again.
TA-154 — ________ and I are getting divorced. Please let us know if you are taking sides. [ ] Yes [ ] No If yes for whom________?
TA-155 — You were easy.
TA-158 — You're consistently inconsistent.
TA-160 — Okay, settle down crazy woman.
TA-162 — I thought you should know I have cancer.
TA-166 — Why do you always have to be the difficult one?
TA-167 — GOT you last!
TA-169 — No, I'm not pregnant. I'm fat.
TA-170 — What the hell were you thinking?
TA-178 — You are just not right.
TA-190 — I quit.
TA-194 — Do you have a fuzzy bunny or a Brazilian bunny?
TA-201 — What the hell is wrong with you?
TA-204 — Thank you for the Czech. He was so big he wouldn't fit in the tube at the bank.
TA-208 — "Yeah, ok, not in the real world.
TA-210 — They're real. They're fake. The world will never know.
TA-228 — Enough with all the sport's analogies.
TA-232 — "When I heard you had a heart attack, I almost had a heart attack.

TA-03 — Why do I always ask a guy (while he's looking for a web page) Got it up?
TA-14 — I don't like people who pause incorrectly while repeating their phone number.
TA-20 — I'm stressed and I'm getting that disgusting thing on my lip.
TA-51 — If I didn't laugh I'd cry.
TA-61 — I don't like watching a sporting event when both teams are wearing the same colors. TA-67 — All I want is a little attention.
TA-72 — It's a whole new world and I'm so lost.
TA-81 — I will not supply your narcissistic behavior.
TA-86 — I don't like coming home to find leftovers I've thought about all day gone.
TA-99 — I mean who wouldn't want a blankie?
TA-130 — "I don't want to work anymore. I just want to be cherished, put on a pedestal and taken care of.
TA-148 — I'm sorry if I haven't been nice but today is a fat day.
TA-164 — I must warn you. I am the biggest bitch.
TA-165 — I just want to live on a beach and smoke pot.
TA-180 — I'm the only one who cares because I'm the only one with a vagina in this house!!!
TA-202 — Everyone annoys me.
TA-209 — "Since you don't speak to me during sport's season anyway, leave $100 on the night stand.
TA-222 — When it rains I dance barefoot outside with a ring of daisies in my hair.
TA-224 — I'm in my happy place.
TA-225 — You have to get through the storm to see the rainbows.
TA-234 — I lost my house I'm bankrupt and I need a job. And you? Just thought I'd catch up and say Hi.

TA-32 — Happy Anniversary.
TA-78 — Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad! This is what I want for my birthday: video game bicycle gift card refrigerator for my room cash
TA-87 — Congratulations on your engagement you have overachieved.
TA-110 — Stop Whining, it's just your bris.
TA-122 — Goo Goo Gaa Gaa Yeah. Congratulations on your new baby.
TA-137 — Congratulations on your divorce. We hated him.
TA-138 — Congratulations on your divorce. We hated her.
TA-142 — "Congratulations on your new baby. Remember once the child says mommy breast feed me, it's time to stop.
TA-153 — Congratulations on getting hitched.
TA-168 — Congratulations on your engagement.
TA-174 — Congratulations on graduation. You're in the real world now. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
TA-176 — You really don't know your friends until they become parents. Congratulations on your new baby. Hopefully we'll remain friends.
TA-238 — The check is inside.

TA-09 — Happy Birthday.
TA-109 — Just a reminder that my Birthday is next week.
TA-118 — I know it's your birthday but I'm selfish and I want to go where I want to go.
TA-129 — "If you use #15 twice, is it the same as putting on #30 sunscreen?
TA-131 — If you're mean you get nothing.
TA-135 — Picture of birthday cake
TA-136 — I'm sorry you're old.
TA-140 — "I'm starving, all I've had is a cup of coffee and some pills. Let's meet for lunch.
TA-151 — You'll always be one of the good old boys.
TA-161 — Let's have something pink with sprinkles.
TA-182 — There are good freaks and there are bad freaks. You are one ______ freak.
TA-188 — Remember when we used to get our period? How weird. I mean what was that about?
TA-231 — I missed your birthday.
TA-235 — I'm bankrupt but I just bought the most beautiful dress.
TA-236 — You are a horrible driver.
TA-239 — Are we at that age where we should feel grateful to be with someone who can drive at night?

TA-88 — You are so accident- prone we should wrap you in bubble paper.
TA-93 — Cancer Sucks.
TA-128 — Everyone knows you're a hypochondriac.
TA-189 — Just because you have cancer and you're getting all of this attention doesn't mean you're better than me.
TA-192 — I don't feel well and nobody cares.
TA-218 — Hey Chemo-sawbee. Just checking in and seeing how you're feeling.
TA-233 — Sorry I forgot I have Chemo-brain.

TA-18 — Thanks for not being around while I was growing up.
TA-19 — Thanks for being a see you on the weekend parent.
TA-40 — You are a good mom.
TA-41 — You are a good dad.
TA-42 — You are a good sister.
TA-43 — You are a good brother.
TA-48 — Please don't grow up and marry a woman who hates me.
TA-71 — You are adopted.
TA-83 — Unless you're sick I am not your mother anymore until 7:00 am tomorrow.
TA-84 — My brother's a jerk .Thanks Mom and Dad you've created a monster.
TA-117 — Mom and Dad are: Having fun now that you're at camp. Working all Day. On a cruise, wish you were here, Love you very much and hope you're having fun.
TA-120 — Hope you are having fun at camp. Dad and I are having the best time. We are eating at all of your favorite restaurants, sold all of your toys and possessions, then used money to go to water park.
TA-183 — When you grow up I just want you to say good things about me to your therapist.
TA-186 — You don't want this family life anymore?
TA-211 — My favorite sport is the sport my child is playing that day.
TA-212 — You're getting us really excited for the day you move out of the house.
TA-221 — Now that you have left for college we've moved and have left no forwarding address.
TA-240 — You are a great kid.
TA-241 — Motherhood can really suck.
TA-242 — I love you even though you're mean to me.

TA-27 — I'm starving.
TA-29 — Bar Mitzvah Card.
TA-30 — Bat Mitzvah Card.
TA-33 — I want you to be my Valentine.
TA-55 — I know I'm Jewish. If I want to have Christmas lights on my house I will.
TA-70 — PEACE. That's All.
TA-85 — Happy St. Patrick's Day. Forget the green beer get me a vodka.
TA-94 — Boo!
TA-95 — I'm scared. Will you spend Halloween with me?
TA-100 — Could you please PASS-OVER me and not all on me to read at the seder?
TA-101 — To my fellow Jew- Merry Christmas we'll see you at the Chinese restaurant around 7'ish?
TA-102 — I love Christmas because it's about gifts.
TA-103 — Happy Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. The holiest and only days we go to temple all year.
TA-105 — Happy Thanksgiving
TA-107 — Happy Valentine's Day. Thank you for breaking my heart.
TA-108 — Just a reminder that Valentine's Day is next week.
TA-126 — Happy Easter! Next year no cigarette with the bunny costume.
TA-127 — It's Ash Wednesday! What's that dirt on your forehead? Because I don't know anything about that Jewish stuff.
TA-139 — "Merry Christmas to a Ho, Ho, Ho.
TA-145 — SHHHHHHSH! Let's have a morning cocktail. See you at church.
TA-173 — Happy Mother's Day… I thought you'd be happy to know that I'm now you.
TA-175 — "Happy Father's Day Daddy!!! Can I move back home with my husband and kids, use your credit card, and hang out like we used to?
TA-193 — I hate Valentine's Day.
TA-195 — It's Christmas. Time to get Rudolph out of the red-light district.
TA-196 — I hope you recognize Santa this year because he's been taking North Pole Dancing classes.

TA-04 — So you're gay.
TA-07 — You are my mother. You are crazy.
TA-08 — People grow up at different times.
TA-104 — I love Chanukah because it's about gifts.
TA-106 — Thanks for breaking up with me.
TA-11 — Tsup?'
TA-113 — You are a compulsive liar.
TA-116 — Can I move in with you?
TA-119 — Fine! 15 minutes that's it. Make it snappy.
TA-121 — The Economy. That's Why.
TA-123 — Move your head I can't see the T.V.
TA-132 — "If you are nice to me all the time we will have sex. If not, forget it.
TA-144 — "Sweet Tea, BBQ and Football.
TA-15 — "Mom and Dad: I know you've lied about The Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, and The Tooth Fairy. Cut the crap.
TA-159 — Huh?
TA-16 — Green Card.
TA-163 — STOP Drop the cookies and put your hands in the air.
TA-172 — "You're low cholesterol, low in sugar and 99% fat free!!!
TA-179 — Fine. I'm a home-wrecker. I'm sorry.
TA-181 — Self-Help Greeting Card
TA-184 — HMMMM… Who will be the next one to get thrown under the bus?
TA-185 — I bet I'll lose my white house before you lose yours!
TA-187 — "When I grow up I want to be a Senator or Congressman, have a wife, a girlfriend and a baby…
TA-191 — There's no place like OM (think yoga).
TA-197 — I just joined Hoarders Anonymous. Never throw this away.
TA-199 — Cut the umbilical cord.
TA-205 — "I love Affirmations, but the diet ones don't work.
TA-207 — I'm starting to get really excited about my second marriage.
TA-213 — Remember when I said I'm out of here when the kids turn 18?
TA-214 — It's in the mail.
TA-215 — You are so hard to work with.
TA-216 — "I know how rude it is to break up in a text. So here, take this.
TA-217 — "Now that the kids are out of the house, I'd like to introduce myself. I'm _____ and I think you're really cute.
TA-219 — Thank you for letting me into your life.
TA-226 — Congratulations to your and your future ex-husband on your engagement.
TA-227 — Congratulatiuons to you and your future ex-wife on your engagement.
TA-229 — No more quarters. Game over.
TA-230 — Take a lap.
TA-237 — I took my afikomen money and bought pot. Then I ate the afikomen.
TA-31 — Come touch MY stimulus package
TA-49 — Thanks for paying my bills. (By the way I told my therapist that you were really excited that she was going on vacation for 3 weeks).